Tantric Massage

Tantric massage is an extremely sensual experience and when mastered can add a new dimension to your relationship. The aim of this type of massage is to activate and spread sexual energy throughout the body and to release any tensions built up in the sexual organs. Unlike most sex related sessions however, an orgasm is an added extra not the purpose of the massage.

When describing the male and female organs, the ancient Sanskrit names are generally used. So guys you are now the proud possessors of a Lingam (loosely translated as Wand of Light) and ladies your intimate areas are now described as Yoni (Sacred temple), which, given their English names, suddenly makes the whole experience feel a little more seductive.

Whilst there are specialist masseurs around the country who are trained in this type of massage, (not a course offered by LearnDirect!), it can be easily be performed in the comfort of your own home.

The first thing is to make sure you are both completely comfortable and have set aside a warm space in the house where you won’t be disturbed. Make sure you have a few fluffy towels to hand and some massage oil. Use candles, soft music, rose petals, aromatherapy oils or whatever you prefer to set the scene…and crank up the heating as this is best done completely naked. A great idea is to take a bath together first which will help you to feel relaxed and get you used to being naked together, as for some this in itself can feel a little intimidating – particular if your chosen sex position is normally under the safety of bed covers! For those not so confident of their body shape, candles are a great choice as they give off an extremely flattering light.

Begin with a full body massage before starting this particular technique. Choose scented oils and use deep firm strokes to knead the muscles or a battery massager if you think your technique is a little rusty. Remember this is a sensuous experience and not designed as the foreplay to sex. The art of Tantric massage is to connect and free tension and if done correctly can be an incredibly emotional as well as sexual experience.

So, you’re relaxed and ready to go so flip a coin to decide who will go first. They then need to prop themselves up on some towels or a cushion, completely exposing the genital area. Their head should be gently supported by another cushion.

Lingam Massage

This massage allows a man to learn to relax and experience a form of pleasure that may be completely new to him. You should remind him to breathe slowly and deeply and to allow himself to sink into a deep relaxation.

With his legs spread and knees bent, pour a small quantity of oil on the shaft of the Lingam and testicles. Performing each stroke very slowly, gently massage the testicles and scrotum. Move onto the pubic bone area above the lingam and then move down to the perineum (the area between the testicles and anus). Finally massage the shaft of the lingam itself. Firmly squeeze the base (not too hard it is supposed to be relaxing!) and gently slide the hand up the shaft to the top. Swap hands and repeat the process taking some time to perform this area of the process. Move on to gently massage the head of the Lingam with a gentle polishing action. Much like reflexology, it is believed that there are many nerve endings here that correspond to other areas of the body, so take your time keeping all movements firm and slow.

If at any time your partner is about to ejaculate, stop the massage to allow the Lingam to soften. Whilst this can appear cruel, it enables the man to develop a mastery of ejaculation. If successful, the man will eventually be able to make love for as long as he requires - becoming multi orgasmic without ejaculating – a great party trick! In fact throughout this massage, you may find the man going hard then soft then hard again. This is often referred to as “riding the wave”.
Whilst continuing the Lingam massage with your right hand, move on to find the Sacred spot with your left. This sacred spot can be found one of two ways. The first is to feel for a small indentation the size of a pea halfway between the anus and the testicles. Press firmly here. At first this may feel uncomfortable but will soon soften when worked on. The second method is via the anus itself. Go very slowly and insert a very well lubricated finger into the anus. (False nails may not be appropriate here ladies unless you use very strong glue!) Crook the finger back to feel the prostate gland and massage very slowly. As he approaches orgasm, stop the Lingam massage and increase the pressure on the sacred spot.

When he feels ready to stop, gently remove your hands and cover him to keep him warm. He may feel very emotional following this massage so allow him to recover. This is a very physical experience which can take a lot out of him so if he falls asleep straight after take it as a compliment!

Yoni Massage

Now it’s time for the ladies!

Using a good water based lubricant or massage oil, lubricate her pubic area and begin to massage her pubic bone very gently. Doing everything very slowly, start to massage her outer labia. Grab one outer lip between thumb and fore finger and squeeze gently. Then slide up and down the lip. Repeat for the other side. Now perform the same action on the inner lips again being gentle and taking things very slowly.
The clitoris is next. This complex structure holds an amazing 6000 nerve sensory endings which is more than any other structure in the human body and all designed only for pleasure! Gently stroke the clitoris in a clockwise then anticlockwise direction.
Slowly insert the middle finger of your right hand into her yoni. (the selection of the hand is important as it embraces the idea of polarity in Tantra). Massage internally with this finger (another finger can be introduced if she is comfortable with this.) Explore and gentle massage inside varying the speed and pressure. With palm facing upwards, crook the finger forward to find the g-spot, a spongy area of tissue under the pubic bone. This pressure on the g spot may cause some women to feel they need to urinate. In fact, G spot massage can lead to female ejaculation which is often why she feels the need to pee. You may at this point wish to insert a finger into her anus (make sure you have discussed this beforehand as this can be seen as invasive if she is not fully prepared and may also undo the all of your hard work in preparing and relaxing her!) Remember the point of the massage is not to invoke orgasm but simply to bring pleasure to the yoni and to free tension.

Whilst performing the above massage techniques with your right hand, use your free left hand to massage her other erogenous zones such as breasts and clitoris. Again vary the speed and intensity of each hand. If she orgasms, continue massaging if she is happy for you to carry on It is possible that she may experience more than one orgasm, each increasing in intensity but again this should be stressed that this is not the main point of the massage. Encourage her to breathe deeply throughout and try to keep eye contact to strengthen the bond between you.

Once the massage is over, allow her to relax and keep her warm.

And Finally...

So there you have it - a very simple but effective massage technique that can bring you closer together. Just remember to keep eye contact throughout to strengthen the emotional bond. Also, try each massage on alternate nights – that way you can make the most of the relaxation without feeling the need to immediately reciprocate. Most of all ENJOY!